POLYGAMY IN INDONESIA

I Goesti Bagoes Djelantik, Regent of Karangasem, Bali with three of his wives in 1925

Polygamy is not illegal in Indonesia but it is frowned upon and appears to be relatively uncommon overall. It is permitted among Muslims, some Chinese Indonesians, and certain traditional groups, though it is not allowed among Christians. Although the practice is legal there are restrictions on having more than one wife. [Source: Clark E. Cunningham, International Encyclopedia of Marriage and Family, Gale Group Inc., 2003]

Polygamy has traditionally only been practiced by the urban lower class, the nobility and high-ranking government officials. In accordance with Muslim custom men are allowed to have up to four wives under strict terms, as defined by Islamic and family codes, namely permission from the first wife. The practice was discouraged in the Suharto years. Those who did it did it quietly. Polygamy reemerged as an issue after Suharto was ousted. Those that do it are much more open it and has become a matter of public debate.

Some Orthodox Muslims have publicly praised polygamy and several government ministers, including the vice president and minster of cooperatives under President Megawati (2001-2004) admitted they had multiple wives. The owner of a chicken restaurant chain with four wives launched some polygamy awards. Supporters of polygamy claim it provides a social purpose: there are more women than men and men have a strong sex drive their whole life and polygamy prevents adultery. Liberal Muslim clerics and feminists have condemned it and spoken out in favor the equality of the sexes. Some want to see a law put on the books, outlawing polygamy.

Some wives accuse their polygamous husbands as using Islam as a cover for philandering ways. Some men get around the rules by marrying privately before a Muslim cleric and witnesses without permission from a Muslim court, which in turn requires the permission of the first wife. In the meantime, an increasing number of women are seeking help from counselors in women’s crisis centers on how to handle their polygamous marriages.

Views on Polygamy in Indonesia

NasDem Party legislator Lora Fadil posing together with his three wives in 2019

Prominent pro-polygamy advocates like Fadil Muzakki Syah, known for living openly with multiple wives, portray polygamy as both desirable and achievable. They often describe harmonious family dynamics and emphasize religious justification, with some claiming that while few women accept polygamy, most men would choose it if given the opportunity. However, critics strongly oppose the practice, arguing that it harms women both psychologically and economically. Researchers and activists, including members of Indonesia’s National Commission on Violence Against Women, report that many wives in polygamous marriages feel neglected, marginalized, or financially insecure. Secondary wives, in particular, may lack legal protection if their marriages are not officially registered. [Source: Farid M. Ibrahim and Holly Robertson, abc.ent, April 5, 2019]

In 2011, Sean Yoong, of Associated Press wrote: “The vast majority of young Muslims in Indonesia and Malaysia appear to disapprove of the traditional acceptance of polygamy but remain reluctant to openly support interfaith marriages or premarital sex, a new survey shows. In the survey coordinated by two German-based cultural organizations, 86.5 percent of 1,496 Indonesians interviewed and 72.7 percent of 1,060 Malaysians said they were against polygamy. More females opposed polygamy compared to males, who are permitted four wives under Islamic law. [Source: Sean Yoong, AP, July 12, 2011]

Indonesian academic Nina Nurmila has published papers on polygamy in Southeast Asia and is the author of "Women, Islam and Everyday Life: Renegotiating Polygamy in Indonesia". She has categorised Muslims into three groups where their views on polygamy are concerned. According to her, the first group comprises Muslims who see polygamy as permitted in Islam (the literalists), the second who see it as permitted with certain conditions (the semi-literalists) and the third who see it as indirectly prohibited (the contextualists). More often than not, Nina said, Muslims failed to read and understand the Quranic verse on polygamy in its full context. "If you believe that Islam allows polygamy or that it is a God-given right, then you are going by the human interpretation of the Quran," she said. “

Polygamy Laws in Indonesia

Indonesian law permits polygamy under strict conditions, including requiring the husband to prove financial capability and he consent of the first wife and court approval, which is typically granted only in cases where the wife is unable to fulfill certain roles due to illness, disability, or infertility. In practice, however, some men bypass these requirements through nikah siri, or unregistered “secret marriages,” conducted informally before a religious figure. These arrangements often create conflict and can leave women—especially second wives—socially stigmatized and legally unprotected. Critics say the safeguards are often bypassed and cases of domestic conflict and inequality are more common in polygamous marriages. [Source: Risyiana Muthia, South China Morning Post, January 11, 2018]

The 1974 marriage law for Muslims draws from Sharia and allows a man to have up to four wives, provided he is able to support each equally.For a man to take a second, third, or fourth wife, he must obtain court permission and the consent of the first wife; however, these conditions are not always required in practice. Many women reportedly encounter societal pressures that compel them to grant permission for additional marriages. Islamic women’s groups remain divided over whether the system needs revision. In 2007 the Constitutional Court upheld a spouse’s right to deny a husband’s demand to take on additional wives, ruling that restrictions on polygamy in the marriage law violate neither the constitution nor tenets of Islam and are necessary to protect the rights of women. Some members of Islamic groups view this as a restriction of their religious freedom. [Source: International Religious Freedom Report for 2012, Indonesia, U.S. Department of State ]

The marriage law makes polygamy illegal for civil servants, except in limited circumstances. A government regulation from 1983 requires male civil servants to receive permission from a government official and their first wives prior to marrying second, third, or fourth wives and prohibits female civil servants from becoming second, third, or fourth wives.

Examples of Polygamy in Indonesia

Polygamy is mostly practiced by lower to lower-middle-class men in Indonesia. On the island of Sumbawa in the 1990s you could find an 80-year-old shaman with six wives and 23 children. Most educated women find the practice too humiliating to endure. Often they ask for a divorce.

One man with two wives described in the Washington Post spent half the week with each of his wives, who live in small houses about four miles apart. The first wife said she found out about the second wife when she notices a strange number on her family cell phone bill. She said when she got over the shock she decided to stay with her husband for the sake of their children.

The husband said he did not seek his second wife. The relationship just happened and he decided to marry the woman, who was a widow, out of a “a mix of passion, love and social responsibility.” His father had two wives and his grandfather had three. He said that the second marriage made him feel like a better Muslim because he could help out a woman who needed some financial help.

Reporting on group in Jakarta called Men’s Coalition against Polygamy, Leo Lewis wrote in The Times, “It joins an alliance of enraged housewives and other snarling activists who see Indonesia’s marriage laws, which allow men to have multiple wives, as unbalanced and a recipe for domestic violence. That line, though, is not the coalition’s central argument: their rather flimsy charge is that the existence of polygamy “labels men as egotistical, aggressive, unfaithful and unable to control their libidos”. Maybe so, but most of us merrily tick all those boxes by simply sitting in the boozer, watching the football, bellowing at the ref and chatting up the barmaid. The creation of the Men’s Coalition against Polygamy is a direct response to the emergence of the Bandung chapter of the Global Ikhwan, or Polygamy Club — an originally Malaysian group chaired by a woman and dedicated to evangelising “the beautiful side of polygamy”.[Source: Leo Lewis, The Times November 4, 2009]

Is Polygamy Making a Comeback in Indonesia?

Once discouraged under former President Suharto, polygamy has seen a modest revival in the democratic era, though it remains controversial. While only a small percentage of marriages are officially recorded as polygamous, the true number may be higher. Religious authorities have taken a neutral stance, saying polygamy is permissible but can be forbidden if it causes harm. Despite ongoing protests and debate, experts believe the practice is unlikely to be banned anytime soon, especially given limited political will and unequal representation of women in government. [Source: Farid M. Ibrahim and Holly Robertson, abc.ent, April 5, 2019]

Efforts to promote polygamy in Indonesia—viewed by some Muslim men as a virtuous practice—have long faced strong public resistance. In 2003, for instance, protesters disrupted a “Polygamy Awards” event organized by pro-polygamy activist Puspo Wardoyo, which aimed to honor men with multiple wives. Demonstrators carrying signs reading “Monogamy Yes, Polygamy No” forced the cancellation of the event, which was never held again. [Source: Risyiana Muthia, South China Morning Post, January 11, 2018]

Public backlash has also affected prominent figures. In 2006, popular cleric and businessman Abdullah Gymnastiar faced widespread criticism after taking a second wife. His followers boycotted his television programs and businesses, leading to the loss of media contracts and the closure of some of his ventures.

In recent years, however, polygamy has re-emerged as a controversial topic, with some claiming that support is growing. Vicky Irawan Zaeni, founder of the Jakarta-based group Dauroh Poligami Indonesia (DPI), argues that negative portrayals in the media have contributed to stigma and misunderstanding. According to him, many problems arise because men practice polygamy improperly, often driven by personal desire rather than religious principles. Groups like DPI aim to promote what they describe as “responsible” polygamy. Through seminars, they teach participants how to seek consent from existing wives, treat spouses fairly, and manage potential conflicts. Zaeni has been involved in such advocacy since 2011, including with earlier organizations that provided counseling, organized gatherings, and even explored legal challenges to Indonesia’s marriage laws.

Indonesia's Polygamy Training Seminars

Zaeni has organised paid monthly 'polygamy seminars' in cities across Indonesia, promoting them with the slogan 'Quick ways to have four wives'.
These one-day classes, organized by the Indonesian Polygamy Forum (FP Indonesia), cost participants several million rupiah and cover topics such as how to enter polygamous marriages, manage multiple wives, and avoid divorce. The organization even claims to provide same-day marriage arrangements for participants considered ready. [Source: Farid M. Ibrahim and Holly Robertson, abc.ent, April 5, 2019]

The workshops, typically limited to about 20 participants—mostly men—are led by facilitators such as Vicky Abu Syamil, who himself has four wives. He says the goal is to educate Muslim men who are serious about practicing polygamy, which supporters argue is permitted within Islamic teachings. Discounts are sometimes offered to women to encourage their participation.

Despite the ongoing controversy surrounding them, pro-polygamy initiatives appear to be growing in popularity within certain communities. The DPI reports high demand for its seminars in several cities, reflecting, it says, a broader trend of Indonesians becoming more open to ideas associated with Islamic law. The seminars have proved so popular that the DPI is launching a new programme: a pre-polygamy seminar aimed at young, single people interested in polygamous relationships. The first was held in Jakarta in January 2019 followed by one in Surabaya in February. [Source: Risyiana Muthia, South China Morning Post, 11 January 2018]

Pro-Polygamy Dating App in Indonesia

In April 2017, Lindu Cipta Pranayama launched AyoPoligami, a Tinder-like mobile app designed to help pro-polygamy Muslims find partners. Loosely translated as “Let’s do Polygamy,” the app quickly drew attention, attracting 56,000 users within its first three months. [Source: Risyiana Muthia, South China Morning Post, January 11, 2018]

Lindu, then 34, said he initially created the app for personal reasons, as he had never been married and had struggled to find a suitable partner through existing dating platforms. Drawing on his background in IT, he decided to build his own matchmaking service.

Although the original idea was to develop a conventional dating app, Lindu changed direction after speaking with other users during informal research. Based on those conversations, he chose to create a platform specifically for men seeking additional wives in polygamous relationships.

The app’s first run was short-lived. After five months, Lindu shut it down and deleted all 56,000 user accounts when it emerged that nearly half were fake. Around the same time, a journalist who went undercover as a user reported being approached by men requesting photos or seeking extramarital affairs, raising further concerns about misuse.

In October 2017, Lindu relaunched AyoPoligami with stricter registration requirements. Users were asked to submit official documents, including identification, proof of a wife’s consent, or divorce papers. Despite receiving around 30,000 applications after the relaunch, only about 2,000 users completed the verification process.

Indonesian Muslim Cleric Arrested over 12-Year-Old Bride

Arranged marriages between older men and much younger girls are common in poor rural areas in Indonesia. These marriages are not registered so they are not legally recognized, but are religiously sanctioned. Indonesian law has harsh penalties for pedophilia, which have been applied to child marriages. According to UNICEF the practice of early marriage is most common in Sub-Saharan Africa and South Asia.

In March 2009, an Indonesian Muslim cleric, who took a 12-year-old girl as a second wife, was arrested on charges of obscenity, and might face up to 15 years in prison the Jakarta Globe reported. The 43-year-old Pujiono Cayho Widiyanto, a wealthy businessman and cleric, was arrested by police in the central Java city of Semarang, after her married a poor village girl, Lutfiana Ulfa, sparking nationwide outrage. "We've collected enough evidence to charge him with under age obscenity under the Criminal Code," chief detective Royhardi Siahaan was quoted as saying by the Indonesian daily the Jakarta Globe.[Source:AlArabiya.net, March 18, 2009]

AlArabiya.net reported: “The cleric was arrested after police collected documents proving Ulfa was under age, Siahaan said. Widiyanto and his supporters argued that his actions are acceptable under Islam but others say he should abide by state law, which sets 16 as the minimum age for female marriage, and 19 for males.

Six months later the Jakarta Post reported from Semarang: Prosecutors have demanded a court sentence a wealthy Muslim cleric to six years in prison for sexually abusing a 12-year-old girl he took as his unofficial wife. Widiyanto Pujiono Cahyo, 45, also known as Sheikh Puji, married the girl in August 2008. He has defended his unofficial second marriage by saying the girl had reached puberty. Prosecutors also asked the court to fine Pujiono, 45, Rp 60 million ($6,700) or face a further six months in prison. “We recommend six years in prison for him,” prosecutor Suningsih told the court. “He has been sexually abusive toward women, especially towards this underage girl. As the owner of a religious school, he does not set a good example.” [Source: Candra Malik, Jakarta Globe, October 22, 2010]

Lutfiana became the cleric’s second wife after a wedding ceremony that the cleric said was valid under Islamic law but not civil law. The marriage sparked a public outcry, with critics accusing the cleric of practicing legalized pedophilia. Pujiono’s lawyer has said the girl refused to annul the marriage because she loved the cleric.

Pujiono, the head of the Miftachul Jannah Islamic boarding school in Central Java, was arrested after a report was filed against him by the Anti-Corruption Civil Society Coalition (Kompak). He claimed in his defense that he had his wife’s approval for the marriage. Seto Mulyadi, chairman of the Indonesian Child Protection Commission, said he regretted prosecutors had not sought a longer sentence. “Both articles of the law he is charged under would warrant a 15-year jail term,” he told the Jakarta Globe.

Why There Is Increased Interest in Polygamy in Indonesia

Siti Ruhaini Dzuhayatin, an academic and founder of Indonesia’s first Women’s Crisis Centre, had spent may years working on women’s rights. She also served as a former chairwoman of the Independent Permanent Human Rights Commission of the Organisation of Islamic Cooperation. Despite renewed campaigns promoting polygamy, she argued that the practice remained socially unpopular in Indonesia, noting that less than one percent of marriages were polygamous. [Source: Risyiana Muthia, South China Morning Post, January 11, 2018]

According to Siti Ruhaini, what appeared to be growing interest in polygamy was actually a form of “moral panic.” As vice-rector of the law faculty at the Islamic State University in Yogyakarta, she explained that such reactions often emerged when people felt unable to cope with social or economic pressures, or with rapid changes brought about by technology and the flow of information. In these situations, society tended to frame complex issues in moral terms, especially those related to sex and sexuality.

She argued that rather than addressing deeper structural problems, some people focused on “fixing” moral behavior. In this context, polygamy was sometimes promoted as a more acceptable alternative to extramarital relationships, reflecting broader anxieties rather than genuine religious commitment.

Siti Ruhaini also pointed out that many supporters justified polygamy as an Islamic practice, although it predated Islam. She explained that Islamic teachings placed limits on the practice—allowing up to four wives—but emphasized fairness and equality, conditions that were extremely difficult to meet. As a result, she said, monogamy was effectively the preferred model within Islam.

She added that women’s rights activists had long worked to raise awareness about the realities of polygamy. In earlier years, initiatives such as a pro-monogamy movement—supported by figures like Yogyakarta’s Sultan Hamengkubuwono X, who did not practice polygamy—had sought to challenge the practice. She suggested that it might be time to revive similar efforts.

Image Sources: Wikimedia Commons

Text Sources: “Encyclopedia of World Cultures Volume 5: East/Southeast Asia:” edited by Paul Hockings, 1993; “Culture and Customs of Indonesia” by Jill Forshee, Greenwood Press, 2006; National Geographic, New York Times, Washington Post, Los Angeles Times, Smithsonian magazine, Encyclopedia.com, Library of Congress, Indonesia Tourism website (indonesia.travel), Indonesia government websites, Live Science, The Conversation, The New Yorker, Time, BBC, CNN, Reuters, Associated Press, AFP, Lonely Planet Guides, Google AI, Wikipedia, The Guardian and various websites, books and other publications.

Last updated April 2026