Facts and Details

SEX IN CHINA

Sexy poster on the
streets of Chengdu Chinese are still pretty conservative when it comes to sex. Virginity is still valued and many people wait until they are married to do it for the first time. China does not have Playboy and Penthouse magazines and the so-called pornography found at video shops is usually fairly tame. China is not like Japan, where men can purchase used schoolgirl panties in vending machines, street corner prostitutes dress up in bunny suits and teenagers join S-and-M telephone chat lines.

But China is not totally puritanical. More and more young people are having sex, often in love hotels. Condoms are sold in movie theater rest rooms, sexual accessory shops are fairly common and street hawkers sell penis rings guaranteed to heighten the pleasure of their partners. In factory towns in southern there are strip shows put together for the factory workers. The owner of the Shanghai Sex Museum told the New York Times, "Chinese have always been careful about hiding their private life. You can't see it from the outside, but inside it is very active."

Things are opening up fast. One Chinese sexologist estimated that 60 to 70 percent of young people have sex before marriage. In the 1980s, the figure was 16 percent. A survey of urban couples found that 90 percent of them had sex before marriage. A survey by the Beijing Evening News in 2006 found that 90 percent of university students feel that sex before marriage is okay.

According to sex survey by SSL International PLC, makers of Durex brand condoms, involving people in 28 countries, the Chinese are the forth least sexually active people, on average having sex only 72 times a year, compared to the world average of 97 times a year.

A United Nations-funded survey of 22,288 Chinese aged 15-24 by the Peking University Population Research Institute in 2009 found that two-thirds were accepting of premarital sex but that most "had very limited levels of sexual reproductive health knowledge." The survey found 22 per cent had had sex before; of those, more than 50 per cent used no contraception during their first sexual encounter.

Testicles in Chinese are called “little brothers.”

Good Websites and Sources: USA Today piece usatoday.com ; China Sex Museum hu-berlin.de/sexology ; Sex Incidents in China zonaeuropa.com ; Sex Industry guardian.co.uk ; Chinese sex toy maker lacyshaki.en ; Books: Sexual Life of Ancient China , written by Robert van Gulik in the 1920s; The Illustrated Handbook of Chinese Sex History by Professor Liu Dalin and Sex China Studies in Sexology in Chinese Culture by Fang-ju Juan’. The Sexology Research Institute of China is at People's University in Beijing.

Sex History and Literature Ancient Sex Culture China.org ; Chinese Sex Literature yellowbridge.com ; Sex in Ancient China Book Review dannyreviews.com Prostitution in China : China Law blog chinalawblog.com ; Wikipedia article Wikipedia ; Shanghaiist blog shanghaiist.com ; Prostitution warning gochina.about.com Homosexuality in China Purple Dragon gay travel specialists Purple Dragon ; China Daily article chinadaily.com ; National Institute of Health paper /gateway.nlm.nih.gov ; Articles from the 1990s brooklyn.cuny.edu ; Some Sources on gay life in China fordham.edu/halsall ; Gay in Rural China sfgate.com ; Gay Scene in Shanghai shanghai-guy.com

Links in this Website: SEX IN CHINA Factsanddetails.com/China ; SEX AND HISTORY IN CHINA Factsanddetails.com/China ; PROSTITUTION IN CHINA Factsanddetails.com/China ; HOMOSEXUALS IN CHINA Factsanddetails.com/China ; MAO'S PRIVATE LIFE Factsanddetails.com/China ; MARRIAGE, LOVE AND DATING IN CHINA Factsanddetails.com/China ; CONCUBINES AND DIVORCE IN CHINA Factsanddetails.com/China

Sex and Asians

The curator of a sex museum in Seoul told the Los Angeles Times, “A difference between the Eastern and Western views of sexuality is that Asian religion, especially Hinduism and Tibetan Buddhism, generally view sexuality as a natural element of human expression and religion, yin-and-yang forces and life as a whole, Often in the West, on the other hand, its viewed in a more limited way largely focused on the act itself.”

Koro is a mental disorder found in Malaysia (with similar disorder found elsewhere in East Asia) characterized by intense anxiety that sexual organs will recede into the body and cause death. There are occasional epidemics of this disorder.

Breast shape and size, nipple color and shape, the form of a woman's labia and buttocks and the angle of man's erection varies somewhat between ethnic groups.

Asian women generally have smaller breasts than Western women. Writer Paul Theroux once wrote that the brassier is "probably the most superfluous garment in China." Even so Wonder Bra developed a special product line for slim Asian women. An accountant in Hong Kong told Newsweek, "There's a strong desire to be sexy. People want to marry a good husband, and a push-up bra is part of the package to achieve that goal."

In Asia condoms used to be called "French letters." In 1827, there were reports of condoms made of tortoiseshell and leather being used in Asia. Some Asian men have an operation in which metal balls are placed inside their penises to increase the pleasure of their partners.

Displays of Affection and Shyness About Sex in China

Night Revels
by Gu Hongzhoung Public expressions of affection between men and women are frowned upon and couples seldom even hold hands where other people can see them. For a while there was an unwritten rule that couples should walk three feet apart on the streets. Men rarely say to their wives, "I love you” and when given the choice most men prefer to with other men and than with their wives.

Chinese are often more affectionate with members of their own sex than they are with the opposite sex. It is not unusual to see women holding hands or men walking down the street arm and arm. In discos you are often more likely see couples of the same sex dancing together than couples of the opposite sex.

The most casual public displays between the sexes can cause a scandal. In amateur university dramas, female and male students sometimes find playing spouses, boyfriends or girlfriend to be so painfully embarrassing that the roles are played by members of the same sex, who feel much more comfortable holding, stoking and caressing each other than members of the opposite sex do.

Strip tease shows are forbidden, even in brothels. Some showgirls break own in tears when asked to wear sexy costumes. The word sex can not be used in advertising or in the name of a product. Cassettes of sickenly sappy and sentimental Chinese pop music are still confiscated from time to time for being "unhealthy music."

In the mid 1990s, four nude statues on a bridge over the Yangtze River had their private parts covered by scarves. When asked them, one local man said he wanted the statues to remain covered because they might cause him to drive his car into the river.

Some Chinese "are still very shy about sex," the owner of the Adam and Eve Health Care Center sex shop told the New York Times. "With so much shyness, scientific knowledge about sex cannot spread widely."

Kissing and Smooching in China

Many university students and young people in their twenties have never kissed a member of the opposite sex and never even seen their parents kiss. Kissing is regarded as just one step shy of sex. French kissing is seen as some kind of exotic, forbidden experience. In secondary schools there are rules that state that students can not "touch, embrace or kiss."

Because there is little privacy at home and young lovers often can't afford a hotel, couples go to smooch behind trees at public parks, or inside bomb shelters built during the Cultural Revolution "for the coming war." After the discos close young lovers go to special bars and restaurants were they can make out. Couples can sometimes be seen kissing and embracing in public places around breakfast time."

"The Chinese." wrote Theroux, "were so desperate in their courtships that they went on tourist outing in order to hide and canoodle. Every holy mountain and famous pagoda had more than its share of motionless couples hugging and (sometimes) smooching...the Chinese do it standing up, usually behind a rock or a building, and they hug each other very tightly."

Public displays of affection that were unthinkable a generation ago are now common place. In 2009, a shopping mall in China drew a large crowd with a kissing contest on Valentine’s Day.

In the mid 2000s, A woman named Xia Xinfeng killed her lover by passing him a capsule filled wit rat poison during a kiss. She was caught and sentenced to death.

Virginity in China

Making love with a young virgin is highly sought after by some men and many men expect their brides to be virgins. Some are devastated when they find their wives are not on their wedding night. Some women pay $25,000 for an operation to get their hymen sewn up. When asked, many Chinese men in their mid-twenties admit proudly that they are virgins. One man told Theroux in the 1980s, "It seems to be a problem in China. No sex for young people...Even if you meet a girl there is no place to take her. But I don't mind...Its unlawful and against are traditions [to have sex before marriage]."

According to the Global Times: ‘Many women in China are dumped or divorced after men deflowered them and found no bleeding, which causes many desperate women...Xie to fake their virginities.’ This has even true with women who were virgins but who lacked hymens because they were born without one or ruptured it long before any sexual activities, either by accident or through sporting activities. [Source: Lin Meilian, Global Times June 17, 2010]

According to the 2007 Global Sex Report released by Durex, an international condom manufacture, the average age of ‘first contact’ for Chinese people is 22, while the global average age is 17]

Tan Zhonglun, 28, a doctor in Guangdong Province who recently got married, told the Global Times, that even well-educated, open-minded young men in China place a premium on their wife’s virginity. ‘To be honest, we care. It is not that broken piece of tissue that bothers us, but the fact that other men had touched her before,’ he said, admitting that the moment he found out his wife was a virgin, he took her even more seriously. “ [Ibid]

He said young couples are more likely to accept sex outside marriage, however, for older generation it represents the highest moral standard for a family's reputation. ‘If future in-laws pop that question, they only want to hear 'yes' from their future daughter-in-law,’ he said. ‘I have to say that despite the modern education we receive, the traditional idea of virginity still lingers in men's mind.” [Ibid]

According to a survey released in 2010 by the National Working Committee on Children and Women under the State Council, 22.4 percent of Chinese people had experienced sex before marriage, and 60 percent are ‘relatively tolerant’ towards sex before marriage. ‘I don't want to lie,’ said Li Jing, a 30-year-old single woman at a Beijing-based advertising company. ‘But still, it is not something you can say out loud. When people ask if I am a virgin or not, I say 'Hmmm I am a human being.'” [Ibid]

In 2005, officials of a village in Chongqing forced unmarried women to pass a chastity test before receiving compensation for farmland appropriated by the government. They argued that only virgins deserved compensation. [Source: Sharon Lafraniere, New York Times, October 25, 2009]

Virginity Restoration Kits in China

In China it is possible to buy artificial hymens at local sex stores . The 100-yuan kits contained a small dark-red semitransparent plastic insert and promise:’Your virginity back in 20 minutes!..No surgery, no shots, no medicine, no side-effects. For a cool 100 yuan ($14.60) you can have your 'first time' back anytime!’ [Source: Lin Meilian, Global Times June 17, 2010]

The Global Times described a woman named Xie that purchased a box of ‘Virtuous Girl Red’ hymens from a Chongqing sex shop for her first physical union with her husband-to-be. ‘Xie tore off its cover, inserted it and waited 20 minutes until it ‘melted’, and then carefully climbed into bed where her husband-to-be was waiting, with a voice running through her head saying, ‘remember to act like you are in pain.” [Ibid]

After a few ups and downs, moans and groans, they relaxed, turned on the light and excitedly spotted a liquid that looks like blood on the bed sheet. He smiled and held her tightly in his arms. She felt like she was standing at the door of heaven until his question drew her quickly back to earth...’Honey, what is that smell?’... It turned out that the ‘user friendly guidelines’ written on the Virtuous Girl package neglected to mention a significant drawback: the ‘blood’ smells...They broke up eventually.” [Ibid]

Xie, 27, from Chongqing and who had had one previous partner prior to her ‘second virginity,’ told the Global Times that the reason she faked her virginity was because of pressure from her ex-boyfriend's family. ‘I wanted to tell him the truth before our wedding because I thought he is open enough to accept me, ‘ Xie said. ‘But one day I overheard the conversation between him and his mother, asking if he was my first man....Then I realized if virginity means so much to his family, then I have to do something.” [Ibid]

The worse was yet to come. The artificial virginal hymen ruined her would-be marriage, left her heartbroken and with pain whenever she urinated. After consulting doctors, Xie found she had contracted vaginitis as a result of the failed cover-up operation. ‘I don't regret using a fake hymen, but I don't recommend others use one,’Xie said after 800 yuan in medical bills hadn't rid her of vaginitis after eight months. “ [Ibid]

Japanese Virginity Restoration Kits in China

Perhaps if Xie had paid more for a Japanese-made fake hymen, her experience would not have been so painful, emotionally and physically. A box of two Japanese hymens can sell around 500 yuan, compared to thosecmade in China that cost about 100 yuan. However, all online shops claim they are selling Japanese hymens and most warn that the cheaper models, such as Xie's, will lead to vaginal infections. The distribution is also ‘buyer-friendly’. People can choose from the local sex shop, buy on-line or contact a salesperson directly through a little advertisement posted in a public toilet. “ [Ibid]

A salesman at xuexing.org, an online shop that sells fake hymens, told the Global Times that they receive ‘many orders everyday’, not only from worried Chinese women but also from the United States, South Korea and Egypt. Bahador Bahrami, an Iranian neuroscientist working in Denmark, bought twoboxes online. Each box contained two ‘hymens.’ ‘It is a gift for fun,’ he told the Global Times. ‘It is the kind of product that will do immense good,’ he said. ‘Virginity is still an important concept in Iran, even among the more progressive middle-class youths.” [Ibid]

“The ones packed in a paper bag are made in China and cost 98 yuan; while the ones packed in a wooden box imported from Japan, 125 yuan, said the sales-man. ‘Buy five boxes at one time, you get 20 percent off,’ he added. ‘Some Chinese ones are as low as 50 yuan.’ Students and prostitutes are the main custom-ers, he said. “ [Ibid]

An Internet search found one shop based on taobao.com selling second-time virginity. The shop, based in Hefei, Anhui Province, has sold around 100 hymens within a month. The price is an exorbitant 459-yuan per box, whereas in a sex shop, the same product will cost 120 yuan. To protect privacy, however, the thoughtful online shop owner created a fake link for their customers, from which a ‘Korean dress’ is shown on their purchase record. “ [Ibid]

Virginity Restoration Surgery in China

“Re-created virgin’ surgery at the private Beijing Wuzhou Female Hospital costs between 3,000-10,000 yuan, depending on the extent of the ‘damage.’ The prices at public hospitals are much cheaper, ranging from 1,500 to 3,000 yuan, but they are likely to turn down patients on ‘moral grounds.’ [Source: Lin Meilian, Global Times June 17, 2010]

Zhou Hong, vice-president of Wuzhou Hospital and the director of the gynecologic division said, ‘Doctors at some public hospitals say 'no' to hymen repair surgery because they think it is not necessary and immoral to cheat their future husbands’. “ [Ibid]

The surgery, however, is fast and easy. It takes about half an hour. Patients can walk around at the same day of the surgery. It promises to give you ‘real blood, real pain’ and that even an experienced man cannot tell his ‘virgin bride’ is faking. ‘We still educate our patients that a woman's value should not be judged by a piece of tissue, but if they insist, we would do it for her anyway,’ Zhou added. “ [Ibid]

Zhou's patients are mainly women aged between 20-30. The surgery usually takes place before the marriage. She declined to tell the number of operations she conducts each month, saying she doesn't want to encourage women to do it. The demand has been stable in the past decade. Chang'an Hospital in Guangzhou, Guangdong Province conducted over 300 operations in 2007 according to the hospital's website. ‘From a medical point of view, the hymen is no more than a piece of tissue, yet people have given it too much symbolic meaning,’ Zhou said. ‘We should free women from feeling guilty about not being a virgin on their wedding night. “ [Ibid]

“Personally, I am not a supporter of the surgery,’ Zhou repeated.However, she said she understands the necessity for restored hymen surgery and provides reassurance to her patients. ‘You shouldn't worry at all, the right amount of blood will show up at the right time and in the place. Even if the man takes a close look down there, he can not tell the difference,’ she said. “ [Ibid]

Having Sex in China

Man and two women Most unmarried adults still live with their parents and sexual encounters usually take place in rented apartments or when parents are at work. For one-night stands and affairs couples with enough money check into love hotels

In a survey in the 1990s, only 60 percent of the respondents said they were "often or sometimes" naked during sex, "In a society were 120 million Chinese live without electricity, even in winter," wrote Patrick Tyler of the New York Times, "the removal of clothes and foreplay does not seem to be a critical issue."

In a regular column on sex in the popular Southern Weekend newspaper the question was asked: "What do women need from sex?" The answer was a "high tide," or orgasm. According to a survey women reached high tide 40 percent of the time, but one sixth of the women questioned had never experienced it. "Husbands should understand women's feelings about sex," the article said. "Sexual high tide not only benefits women's health, but also benefits women's spirit." [Source: Patrick Tyler, the New York Times, November 26, 1994]

Students say that the age in which young people first have sex is getting lower and lower. A 26-year-old student in Shenzhen told Newsweek, "Sex is really casual these days. People have lots of boyfriends, but they don’t know what love is." The owner of a Beijing sex shop told the New York Times, "People used to think that once they had their kid, that was it, sex was over. But people’s attitudes toward sex have changed dramatically."

Tao and Sex and Traditional Sexual Symbols

According to Taoism sex and spirituality are linked through the union of the cosmic forces of ying and yang. Taoist believe that ying and yang exist within each individual and "having sex, especially in the wilderness, was a way to cultivate oneself and prolong life."

In the Taoist sex manual, The Plain Girl's Secret Way, men were told to have a lot of sex but not come very often. That way their yang (the male essence, the source of masculine strength, power and longevity) would remain within their bodies. Life-extending Taoist sexual practices also encouraged men to have a lot of sex because the waters of the yin (vaginal secretions) helped strengthen a declining yang.

These beliefs live on in shenkui, a mental disorder found in China and Taiwan characterized by extreme feelings of panic and anxiety associated with complaints attributed to perceived death caused by loss of semen.

In China the dragon sometimes symbolizes a penis, and a lotus flower, a vagina. The vagina also is sometimes referred to as the jade gate and jade generally has sexual connotations in China. Some Chinese believe that jade is the petrified semen of a dragon. The Imperial sex handbook described "Jade Girl Playing the Flute" (oral sex) and Fish Interlocking Their Scales (woman on top).

Mistresses and Concubines in China

See Marriage, People

New Openness and Attitudes About Sex in China

sexy fashion show Today in China, many cities have sex shops, sex-advice call-in shows, sex clinics and newspaper advertisements for condoms and Viagra. Discos in Shanghai plays songs that praise oral sex; shops in the Beijing airport sell love oils, vibrators and specialty condoms; newspapers runs headlines such as ORGASM: DIFFERENT TYPES; and waitresses and chambermaids working at four-star hotels offer guests special massages with "extra service."

The China Youth Daily has run an article about sex toys; the People’s Daily has featured stories about ancient sex; and the state agency new service Xinhua runs photos of scantily clad women on its website. One shot shows a foreign swimsuit model in only a bikini bottom. The foreign press is even more racy. The Chinese version of the man’s magazine FHM runs stories like “I Want an Orgasm, Not Romance.”

Analysis of 100,000 callers to a Shanghai information radio line found that "sex" and "banking" were the two most asked about topics. "The majority of Chinese have experienced a great change in their attitudes toward sex in the last 10 years," a sex researcher told the New York Times," Feudal ideas still exist, but they are getting less and less influential."

Virginity is less of a prerequisite for marriage than it once was. About half the abortions in China these days are performed on unwed women. In one Chinese sex survey, nearly 75 percent of the respondents said that sex was necessary for both emotional and physical health.

Edward Wong wrote in the New York Times: “Brothels — often thinly disguised as hair salons or massage parlors — and shops selling sex toys proliferate across cities and even in many villages, and premarital sex is common among young couples. Tens of thousands of Chinese engage in swinging (or partner swapping, which is a more direct translation of the relevant Chinese term), according to Li Yinhe, China’s most prominent sexologist. One Web site, Happy Village, has a chat forum openly dedicated to swinging. [Source: Edward Wong, New York Times, May 20, 2010]

Pole-dancing, see recreation

Sex Education in China

Sex education was introduced in 1985. At that time forth graders were shown anatomically correct bodies and told about sexual reproduction and middle school students attended classes in "adolescent studies." The result was that children were often better informed about sex than their parents. One 12-year-old boy who was taken to a clinic by his mother after she discovered stains on his sheets told his mother, “Wet dreams are normal. They told us that at school."

In the Mao era, with taboos on the discussion of sex and a lack of sex education, many Chinese grew up ignorant about sex. One Chinese doctor told the New York Times, "particularly in the small cities and towns, sheer ignorance of sex is a big, big problem There are so many wrong ideas, even among doctors, that people don't know what to believe." To make his point he showed an article in army magazine by an "expert" on premature ejaculation who warned that masturbation led to impotence.

Free sex education workshops are held in some places for adults. Many of those who attend are adults who are planning to get married in the near future. One man attending one of these classes told the New York Times, "I need to learn some things: when is the best time to get pregnant, what kinds of contraceptives are available? Both men and women should be informed."

Sex education in the schools is still in the developing stages. Different districts have different texts. A typical sex education film shows some sperm uniting with an egg and some clips of animals having sex. Xu Zhenlei, an official with the China Sexology Association told the Washington Post: “Generally speaking, most parents are against sex education. If you are talking about the sex education they say, ‘Don’t date and focus on your studies.’

A United Nations-funded survey of 22,288 Chinese aged 15-24 by the Peking University Population Research Institute in 2009 found that two-thirds were accepting of premarital sex but that most "had very limited levels of sexual reproductive health knowledge." The survey found 22 per cent had had sex before; of those, more than 50 per cent used no contraception during their first sexual encounter.

See Love, Marriage

Image Sources: 1)Sex products, Alibaba.com; 2) Sexy poster, University of Washington; 3) ox peninses, BBC; 4) Old sex art All Posters. com http://www.allposters.com/?lang=1 Search Chinese Art .

Text Sources: New York Times, Washington Post, Los Angeles Times, Times of London, National Geographic, The New Yorker, Time, Newsweek, Reuters, AP, Lonely Planet Guides, Compton’s Encyclopedia and various books and other publications.

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© 2008 Jeffrey Hays

Last updated December 2012